Wednesday
March 29, 2000
Volume XXXI
Number 17
Medium Spoofs:
The Rutgers Review
The Daily Targum
The Caellian
Diversions
Black Voice
Medium Sections:
Online Personals
Online Extras
What's Shakin'
Much like athletes, prostitutes get a free ride at Rutgers. If you are providing sex for money and/or drugs, there is no need to attend classes or take exams. Simply fill out the form, have your pimp sign it, and return it to the Administrative Services Building.
Many have questioned the purpose of this policy, but the reasoning is quite simple. Prostitutes attract rich business men to the city of New Brunswick where we have set up shops to sell cheap merchandise with the Rutgers logo. And obviously, money is more important than high academic standards.